I See You

I see you like no one else does or will or can, beyond how you see yourself.
I didn’t look too deeply, more like in a different way, more sideways and oblong than straight on,
And I listened to you changing into someone else when you thought that no one would notice.
I see you stand a foot taller and a megaton prouder and more confident
And infinitely less angry than you really let the world see, because I prefer it that way.
I know how the world has been to you and how you tried to leave it all behind
But you couldn’t because red tape and bureaucracy and the feeling of home kept bringing you back.
I know how the world caught up with you and you gave up running and caring and listening
Because damn there’s nothing worse than other people’s problems on top of your own or in your drink,
And I try to respect that as much as I can, for as long as I can.
I try to break my habit of imposing some power onto you to make the world right
But everything spins so quickly sometimes that I land in your presence begging for an easy fix.
I see a you that maybe doesn’t exist but that I came to know well, and loved,
And maybe that’s why we had to stop talking when we did, because we never met for real.
I know the truth and it hurts and someday I hope to meet the real you
And discard the image of an ideal gone astray and talk to the person I thought would never leave.

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About Paul Carroll

Paul Carroll is a writer, born, raised and still living in Dublin. By day he's a student and bookseller, by night he writes fiction and uses social media.
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